1. Do not assume we are deep dark and depressed. Please. The majority of us chose to leave for our own reasons, and usually those reasons sum up to the fact that the church doesn't make us happy anymore. And for those who were excommunicated, even if they want to come back, they are definitely working on themselves and finding out who they really are. Just because the church makes YOU happy doesn't mean it makes everyone happy.
2. NO! we do not all just go off the deep end and go crazy with drugs and alcohol. Do not assume the worst of someone just because they don't have an organized religion in their lives. For me personally, I have actually found more stable and even minded people outside of the church than I ever did in it. Saying every Ex-Mormon goes crazy with drugs and alcohol is like saying every Mormon is pushy and judgmental. Just because some are like that, does not mean all are.
3. We do not want to be "saved". I know LDS people think they are doing the right thing by knocking on our doors all the time trying to get us to get involved with church activities, or sending missionaries to us.. But trust me, you are not doing the right thing. If we have chose to leave the church it is for a reason, lots of reasons, and they are all very good. Do you see us coming and knocking on your door trying to take away your faith? No, you don't. So please stop doing it to us.
4. We did not just leave because of inconsiderate or rude people in our wards. Trust me, the reason for us leaving is usually for a lot of deep and meaningful reasons to us. Yes, less than positive environments at church on Sunday may have helped push us away, but it is never the ultimate reason. If that was the only reason, and we still believed in what the LDS church has to offer, the majority of us would have stayed and dealt with the people. Do not assume we are so shallow.
5. We as a person have not changed. You know that person you knew and were friends with in Sunday school? Yeah, we are still here, we are just more confident and our personalities are amplified. We are following our paths in life, and we are happier than ever. We as a person, have not changed, just a title we used to have is changed. And yes, we would still like to be friends with you.. If you aren't doing it just to push religion on us. We are who we are, you are who you are, and we both deserve a level of respect.
6. Do we plan on coming back? Well, maybe some of us. But not me, and not the people I know who are no longer inside the LDS church. It is dependent on their reasons for leaving. The majority of us have found happiness outside of it all though.. So if you have someone you know that has left, don't hold onto hope that they will return. Because the likely-hood is that they won't and don't want to, and they are probably sick of you pressuring them to do so.
7. Do we believe in God? Did we change religions? That is a question for each individual Ex-Mormon. Some no longer believe in God for their own reasons, some have gone to a different religion because they personally found more truth in it, some believe in God without feeling the need to tie themselves to any particular religion, and some believe in God and are highly spiritual. I personally believe in God and am very spiritual. I love God, I love life, and I worship how I see fit without anyone else's rules or expectations being put on it. That is how I find my happiness.
8. No. We are not trying to attack and destroy the Mormon church. At least the majority of us are not. We just want to live our lives. But yes, some of us will speak our minds on the matter and share our stories and thoughts and things we have found. Mormons are allowed to talk about what they believe in, and send people door to door.. Why shouldn't we be able to do the same?
9. Living in Utah is very hard to an Ex-Mormon. For the most part we are very disliked, our neighbors won't talk to us, people fear being around us because they fear we are going down their idea of Satan's path.. It's either that or people are far too pushy about making us come back to what they believe is right. It is very one minded in this state, and often it is emotionally hard to be here, and it is hard to make friends. Mormons think they are being hated on, but here in Utah they sure know how to dish the hate and emotional pain..
10. One of our biggest pete peeves.. At least here in Utah, is Mormons walking around talking like everyone is a Mormon or knows what Mormonism is. Don't walk up to someone on the street and say "yeah my son is serving a mission!".. Good for you! But guess what? Not everyone thinks like you, believes like you, or even knows what the heck you are talking about. And it is extremely rude to assume otherwise. Remember assumption makes an ass out of you and me! ;)
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